Does Your Vacuum Suck?

Does your vacuum suck?  Yes, I mean that in more ways than one.  Ok, I am having a vacuum cleaner melt down.  Right now I am sort of super pissed off, so I will probably come off sounding like a crazed, vacuum cleaner hating lunatic.  Which I kinda am.

I don't know, is it just me?  Am I the only person in the United States who cannot find a stupid vacuum cleaner that I like and that works the way I want it to work?  Here are my issues....

I was vacuuming at the lake house the last time we were there and the upright vacuum cleaner that we had, note that I used the word had, kept shutting off while I was using it.  For no good reason.  I'd vacuum a few feet and it would shut off.  I'd jiggle it and bang it, and it would start up again, I'd vacuum a few feet again and the damn thing would shut off again.  Did I mention that this thing was only about 2 years old and it really doesn't get a lot of use at the lake house?  It's not like I'm on a vacuum cleaning mission, I just want to pick up the dog hair, dust bunnies and random dried leaves.  Grrrr....... I couldn't get the damn thing to work right.  I have a bad temper and I opened the door to the back deck and threw the vacuum cleaner out the door where it banged down the stairs and then sat in the rain for a few hours.  I guess I showed it who the boss was.

The next morning I went out, brought it back inside and it started right up.  What the heck??  I smugly started vacuuming again and the fricking thing shut off again.  I checked the bottom by the rollers to be sure nothing was jammed.  I checked the filters - they were clean.  Ok, that was it- I hauled it back outside, threw it in the back of our gator and personally dragged it down to the dump.  I gave it the middle finger salute as I pulled away and never looked back.  Good riddance you piece.... of .....crap!

Louie came back from hunting and when I told him what happened, he went out to the garage and brought in an older vacuum cleaner that he used outside for his boat.  This one was an upright unit like the last one was.  I wasn't having a good feeling....

Honestly, I don't like upright units.  Strike one....  I'm 5'2" and I weight 106 lbs.  The damn uprights weigh practically more than I do and my right bicep is noticeably larger than my left from flinging it around and I practically throw out my back every time I use it.

Strike 2.....  Both uprights were bag less units.  Do you like using a bag less machine?  I must be getting old because I'm old fashioned and I like a dirt bag - I despise a bag less vacuum.  Here's why - when you remove the dump bucket to empty it, all the dust and dirt that you just vacuumed up flies through the air, all over everything you just cleaned.  I personally like it, not, when you remove the dump bucket and a big clump of something falls all over the carpet.  Yech.

At home I have a pull behind, canister unit.  It has a bag, which I like, so that is a plus...

But this leads me to Strike 3, and this applies to both types of vacuum cleaners - their suction, well, sucks.  Or rather, there is a definite lack thereof...   I can pull coke through a straw with more suction than either of these vacuum cleaners can supply. 

So anyway, that leads me to what pissed me off today.  I was vacuuming, again with the upright at the lake, and the aforementioned suction problem was becoming an issue.  Do you ever see something on the floor and roll the vacuum cleaner over it like 18 times and it's still sitting there like it's laughing at you?  So then you have to bend over and manually pick up that crappy little piece of lint?  Why don't vacuum cleaners like me??

The last vacuum cleaner I bought, the one that sailed down the deck stairs, cost me just over
 $ 300.00 brand new.  I thought that was a pretty good chunk of change.  I seriously cannot afford to spend more than that - again!  So here is what I want....

1. a pull behind canister style vacuum that glides easily and doesn't weigh a ton.  I do not want to look like I'm dragging a sack of rocks or a dead body around the house behind me.
2. it has to use a bag.  Co-incidentally, I just bought some bags that had the Febreze air scent attached and I love them.  Nice free plug for Febreze.  Note to Febreze - Please contact me if you'd like to supply me with more of those.  They are fab!
3. it's got to suck dirt like a demon and I mean, like sucking golf balls through a straw.
4. it can't cost me an arm and a leg.

Any suggestions??   What type of vacuum cleaner do you have and what do you like about it?